Now they are classic, historical, old or, simply, old pots. But there was a time when they were "The brand new car", cars that left the dealerships in the middle of a ritual that, on the other hand, has not changed substantially today. Or yes: Today, buying a new vehicle is a very measured process that is not always without problems; But thirty years ago, a series of situations worthy of a script could happen that would delight Berlanga himself.
In this series of stories it's not about pointing fingers to some brands more than others, or to put dealers in the trigger that, in many cases, still exist. Not even remotely; However, they serve to make us realize that, three decades ago, buying a new car could turn into a real nightmare.
It is important that the reader knows that the bizarre situations that are going to be collected here THEY ARE ABSOLUTELY REAL. Its protagonists - with names and surnames to which a monument should be dedicated - have told their cases to the author who signs these lines in a direct way. There are no intermediaries. And above all and paramount: There is no human imagination capable of inventing these stories. After the Most expensive blackmouth in the world, let's go with the Ronda that never existed ...
THE RONDA CLX THAT NEVER EXISTED
Chance has made this story, like the one previously published, happen in the same decade. But, as can be seen in other cases that we will reveal in the future, not everything happened during the rogue 80s.
The purchase a Ronda he promised himself happy for D. Juan Manuel Rodríguez Urbina; As has already been said, it was 1985 and the time had come to 'retire' to your previous vehicle. With money in hand, and once the last agreed peseta had been delivered for the highest model in the range, the brand new Ronda finally appeared before the eyes of the happy owner. Black color, all the extras but ... When you go to pick it up the problems begin.
"Listen, that this is not a CLX, but a CL, a lower version of the car that I have paid for. In other words, this is not my car, I have bought a CLX and that is something else ». The seller hastened to affirm quite rightly: «Yes, but understand that there is no other, so there is no alternative" (!).
After the Martian response and a sterile dialogue repeated ad nauseam, finally the buyer-seller duo arrives at a principle of agreement. With an infinite desire to release the new car at once, it leaves the dealership bound for a rented garage where it will rest quietly until the claims begin to bear fruit. And it is that you have to ask that the extra amount paid for the luxury version be reimbursed.
THE THING LONGS
What was initially going to take a few months ended up being "confined" to Ronda for five long years, which forced its legal owner to buy the space and, in addition, a battered SEAT 133 with which to move long enough to find a way out... You have to have the patience of holy Job and the courage of a Spartan to do this, having a brand new vehicle waiting for you.
During all that eternal period of time, the case was placed in the hands of lawyers who, after the legal procedures and a significant financial outlay, opened a file that was passed on to the National Institute of Aerospace Technology (INTA), a body in charge of carrying out a study. of the vehicle to determine that it was not a CLX but a CL. But the final surprise was yet to come, since not only was it not a CLX, it was also not a CL! It was a version called GLX, which to make matters worse was a variant not yet approved for circulation in Spain.
A KAMIKAZE CLAIM
Faced with the new situation, the owner of a new but increasingly older vehicle, and daily user of an even more ancient jalopy, decides to investigate in depth, and entrusts the lawyers (after disbursing more fees...) a complete investigation, to know the exact origin of the car.
And with research, unsurprisingly, more surprises arrive: The Ronda was stored in the port of Barcelona, in the sun, long enough for its upholstery to discolor, so SEAT changed the seats for new ones before it was sold.
But of course, someone came to the intelligent conclusion that if there was one illegal GLX, surely there was more. Bingo! Vehicle records indicated that there were more GLX models circulating illegally on Spanish roads. Spain is different…
But it doesn't end here. We arrived to the icing on the cake: The owner, a worker for the Iberia airline, received a complaint by letter from the National Institute of Industry (INI) in terms very similar to the following: "How is it possible that you denounce a state car company, when you work in another, also state? But man, who is throwing stones on his own roof! ".
D. Juan Manuel was speechless. Although we are going to put a few more to know the end of all this Kafkaesque madness. It all ends ten years later, that is, in 1995, with already legal papers that allowed the vehicle to pass the regulatory technical inspections annually, until poor Ronda ended his life in a scrapyard with 60.000 kilometers and an owner wanting to travel. , hereinafter, by bus. Textual.